The BLOG · writing on therapy & GROWTHReflections on therapy, relationships, and the slow work of recovery from abuse and harm.
Articles exploring schema therapy, mental health, trauma recovery, and emotional wellbeing — For people doing the slow work of understanding themselves, their relationships, and the harm they've lived through.
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The Failure Schema: When You're Convinced You Will Never Measure Up
Do you dismiss your achievements, fear being found out, or feel like you'll never truly measure up? The Failure schema may be driving that persistent sense of inadequacy — discover where it comes from and how schema therapy can help.
What Adult Grooming Is and how it overlaps with Coercive Control
Understand how grooming operates in adult, faith, and professional settings. A faith-sensitive psychologist explains the psychology of grooming across contexts, manipulation, power imbalance, and recovery after spiritual or relational betrayal.
Scrupulosity and Attachment to God: Why Early Bonds Can Make Faith, Life and God Feel Scary
Scrupulosity—religious OCD—can make faith feel like constant fear of disappointing God. Psychologist Kylie Walls explains that these struggles often stem from deeper attachment patterns shaped in childhood and reinforced by harmful spiritual environments. When leaders are controlling or shaming, the nervous system may learn to view God the same way. Healing is possible with supportive, evidence-based therapy.
Spiritual Abuse: Understanding, Recovering, and escaping the invisible cage
Spiritual abuse and coercive control can leave deep psychological, emotional, and spiritual scars. This article explains how manipulation, misuse of scripture, and clergy exploitation erode autonomy and faith. Learn how spiritual abuse impacts identity, mental health, and relationships—and why independent, trauma-informed care and Christian psychology support are essential for recovery, resilience, and healing in faith contexts.
When Love Becomes an Invisible Cage: Recognising the Signs of Coercive Control and Emotional Abuse, and Religious Abuse
Coercive control and emotional abuse often begin subtly—masked as concern, faith, or guidance—before escalating into an invisible cage of fear, guilt, and isolation. This article explores the signs of coercive control, emotional and spiritual abuse, and the devastating psychological impacts. Learn how to recognise red flags in relationships, why early intervention matters, and how professional Christian psychology support can provide healing, autonomy, and recovery from abuse.
Understanding Adult Clergy Exploitation: Understanding the Patterns of Betrayal and Abuse
Adult clergy sexual exploitation is not an ‘affair’ but a betrayal of trust, power, and spiritual authority. This article explains the stages of grooming in clergy sexual abuse, highlighting patterns of coercive control, manipulation, and boundary violations. Learn how grooming erodes autonomy, the profound psychological and spiritual impact on survivors, and why survivor-centred, trauma-informed responses are essential for healing, justice, and safer faith communities.
Understanding Burnout & Recovery
Burnout is more than stress—it’s emotional exhaustion, disconnection, and loss of purpose. Karen’s story reveals how chronic workplace demands and leadership pressures can spiral into burnout. Learn the signs, impacts, and recovery strategies, including therapy and Christian psychology support. Refuge Psychology, led by registered psychologist Kylie Walls, offers compassionate, faith-sensitive care for leaders and individuals facing burnout and mental health challenges.
Why People Join, Stay in & become complicit in Spiritually Abusive Environments
Spiritual abuse in high-control religious environments often draws people in through love-bombing, trauma patterns, or authority dynamics. This article explores why people join, stay, or become complicit in spiritually abusive churches, using insights from psychology, coercive control, and betrayal trauma. Learn how power, obedience, and gaslighting keep people trapped—and how Christian psychology support can help survivors find healing, autonomy, and freedom.
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